Many readers have asked me: "Why title your latest novel Avengers of the Fart Patrol Versus Monkey Squadron?"

The answer is simple: Avengers of the Fart Patrol Versus Monkey Squadron is the greatest book title in the history of both books and titles.

A book's title is intended to draw in the potential reader, to encourage the reader to pick up the book and contemplate purchasing it or—if the book is shelved at a library—to sign it out. A title should provoke the reader to discover its meaning by reading the attached book. Thus, a title that elicits imperative questions about possible meanings is key.

Avengers of the Fart Patrol Versus Monkey Squadron is such a title. Many questions are incited by this provocative title.

These questions include:

1. What is The Fart Patrol?

2. Why is The Fart Patrol so named?

3. Is it named The Fart Patrol because it is an organization that patrols for farts?

4. Do they try to stop people from farting?

5. Or do they try to encourage more farting by people?

6. Is the patrol made up of people that fart a lot?

7. Or do their farts have special powers?

8. Are they, like, superheros who each possess different fart-related abilities?

Next:

9. Why must The Fart Patrol be avenged?

10. Are they incapable of avenging themselves?

11. Have they been captured?

12. Are they dead?

Then:

13. Who is avenging The Fart Patrol?

14. What is the avengers' relationship with the original Fart Patrol?

15. Are they the children of The Fart Patrol?

16. Do they have fart-based powers similar to those of the original Fart Patrol?

17. Did they learn a lesson from The Fart Patrol's mysterious defeat?

18. Do they have some other skills that will allow them to triumph where The Fart Patrol failed?

Also:

19. What form will their vengeance take?

And:

20. What is Monkey Squadron?

21. Is it a squadron made up of monkeys?

22. The same kinds of monkeys?

23. Or different kinds of monkeys?

24. Is it a squadron of people who are dressed like monkeys?

25. Or is it a squadron of people with monkey-based powers?

26. The same kinds of monkey-based powers?

27. Or a variety of powers, all different, and all related to different kinds of monkeys?

28. Does Monkey Squadron fight for the rights of monkeys to have legal protection within human-based law?

29. Is this because Monkey Squadron has been following recent scientific research about animal intelligence which has established that monkeys in general, and apes like chimpanzees and orangutans in particular, have advanced spatial, temporal, and mathematical reasoning skills and can use abstract communication systems, like sign language, to form complex sentences?

30. Or does Monkey Squadron fight against monkeys?

31. Do they fight against monkeys because they got freaked out when they saw Planet of the Apes as children?

32. When Monkey Squadron is over at someone's house, like at a party, and the host wants to liven things up by putting on a funny video where monkeys dress up like humans and get into amusing misadventures, does Monkey Squadron laugh along with everyone else?

33. Or does Monkey Squadron act all indignant and start lecturing everyone about how monkeys aren't here for our amusement and how many of them are on the endangered species lists and how we should respect monkeys and not treat them like trained retards?

34. Does Monkey Squadron ever lighten up and just go on a wicked bender and start going "ooh-ooh-ooh" and hopping around, you know, like a monkey?

Finally:

36. Will The Fart Patrol be avenged?

37. Or is Monkey Squadron too powerful?

38. Is vengeance ever really a solution?

39. What is more compelling: a fart or a monkey?

40. Is there anything more compelling than a monkey farting?

As any astute reader can see, Avengers of the Fart Patrol Versus Monkey Squadron truly is the greatest book title ever.

Now, I leave the reader to the novel itself. It is my deepest hope that my humble story meets the promise of such a stupendous title.

And keep your eyes out for my next book, Cheese God in the Cathedral of Poop.